Sunday Sunday, ahh ... ahh ... so good to me

Does anyone else find this story as funny as I do?




Oh Oh and there's a video of it here aswell. Evidently the plane spins when you press the button on the side. Cooool

I want one, I want one, I want one

Bomber out

We was robbed!!!

Congrats again to Dave on breaking free of Taiwan and having the courage to head South where the Kangaroo's roam and the sheep are shagging aaaalll daaaay. Sorry, got carried away there.

Sadly Rich has missed the deadline for the worst vom story. Competition is closed; I didn't even get an honorable mention! I did get on in a previous competition about the world's worst food, perhaps I'll share that with you next week.

Hong Kong is one of those places where talking about the weather isn't necessarily just a method of avoiding proper conversation. We got typhoons, we 'ave. Best thing about a typhoon ... ? Day off work, that's what. There's a system of warning signals from T1 to T10, but they only
really use T1, 3, 8, 9 and 10. They mean something like;

T1 - Bit windy
T3 - Typhoon on the way, could get hairy
T8 - Down the pub, work's done for the day
T9 - OOOhh, proper weather, it's a blower
T10 - Don't look now, here comes the finger of God

T8 is as high as it's got since we arrived, and then only 4 or 5 times so the opportunity for a day off due to heavy weather is a tempting proposition. A T8 on a Friday is even better. Imagine our excitement when Taiwan got drowned in 70cm of rain over 24 hours from Typhoon Aere which, once done massacring our friends across the straits headed our way, instead of the traditional route into the mainland and ultimate dissipation. It was due to make a direct hit at 6am this morning but, in a scene that put me in mind of the time the Simpson's home town was threatened with destruction by a giant flaming meteorite that, once it reached Shelborne had burned down to a rock the rough size and shape of a chiwawa's head; as with our storm. Hardly a phutt.

Bastards. China should invade Taiwan NOW for stealing our weather

Bomber out

You'll like this

I've had a sore rib typoe thing for a while so I went to the doctor this morning to make sure it wasn't cracked or out. I'm going to start yoga again and don't want to puncture a lung during downward dog. Or something.

Anyhow, so he x-rays me c hest and finds that the cartilidge is a bit torn or something where the pain is. I fell over a couple of months ago in the flat (sober, unfortunately) and fell on my arm, which probably did the damage. My doctor had an alternative opinion, he suggested;

....You've been gaining weight faster than your skeleton can handle it....

That has to rank as the funniest thing anyone has ever said to me unintentionally, ever. It was the best I could do not to shit myself laughing in front of him.

Told you you'd like it.

We've got a Woody

A couple of weeks ago I linked to a rather good flash animation satyrising the '04 presitential campaign and to a story about Woody Guthrie's record label suing the publishers for copyright blah blah blah for using This Land Is Your Land. In an update this morning, Wired reports that the suit has been dropped, which is actually a bit of a shame because it stood a chance of being one of those benchmark rulings that Smudge is always spouting about (although this one would have been american)

Out

My entry in the B3Ta "worst ever vomit story" competition

Thought you might like this one. I was nominated for "Vom of the millennium" for Bloke Who Caught His Vom in His Mouth in '00 but narrowly missed out to the Bloke Who Vommed in Collis' Pants, which I believe will be made into an HBO original mini-series next season

Anyhow, this story is from '01 and I think it's frankly better than my millennium vom;

Hmm cocktails. Bit lumpy, though
My worst vom must have been the one someone else drank...

Cocktails make me vom. Especially when they have tequila in them. I've no idea why; I've never got riotously drunk on tequila. Well, that's not actually true, but I never got drunk enough to put me off the stuff. Still makes me vom, though and I don't even need to be at all drunk for
it to happen.

Anyhow, so I'm at my mate's wedding banquet; a Chinese tradition adopted by foreigners in Hong Kong; basically dress up, eat lots, get pissed, go clubbing, possibly end up in some go-go bar in WanChai the following morning. We were at the clubbing stage of the evening.

I have several stupid friends who think shooters are clever and don't know of my vom-allergy to Tequila. Sure enough a round of shooters came round and, not wanting to appear a "girl" I held my breath and sucked back on some orangey concoction. Still not sure what it was, but it was
enough to activate the sick trigger.

Didn't even reach my stomach; Leapt back out immediately it got to the lower reaches of my throat, my stomach adding some well considered bile to the mix, just to warn me for next time.

I am fairly used to this happening by now and can usually catch the offending output in the glass it came from but it was past 2 and my aim was off. I caught about half of it in the glass and the rest went up the sleeve in my really fucking expensive suit.

I staggered off to the loo to clean up, hoping that the bile wouldn't have eaten the lining in my jacket by the time I had sponged it off, then rejoined the party ensuring that I stayed on lager for the duration. Craking evening, finishing at about 6am and deftly avoiding
go-go bars; always a plus with a wife to explain yourself to.

I found out about a week later that someone had thought that I had thrown up exclusively down my sleeve and had left half a drink.

After exploring the subject of why they thought this and why it might be important / amusing, I discovered the truth; my bosses wife had necked half a glass of my vom.

My boss knows by now, I believe he will take the secret with him to the grave, though.

It's 100 bucks for all you can drink and eat at the Aussie bar so I'm off

Bomber out

Sugar warning on fizzy drinks

No shit? check out this story in the Guardian, in which the yanks decide that coke might make you fat. No doubt this completely exhonerates McD's

Will find out this morning if our project has made it through the night alive. I recall suggesting a couple of months ago that I was fairly sure that the Main-con on the project had another company in mind for the facade and that, if I were more cynical, I would suggest that company is our joint venture partner. Well, I hate to say "I told me so" but... It further appears (although only circumstantial evidence exists for this) that the PQS and the client's local rep are involved as well. Seems they don't want foreigners on their turf. I expect that this has all been timed to be a fait accompli by the time the French get back from hols (they're starting to dribble back now) so the next few days should be key. I have been suggesting to my boss that he go to the French direct but he seems reticent. His call, I suppose, but I warned him from the start about my suspicions and he decided to play the "white man". Now they're going to fuck us for it.

Back to shop fronts, I expect. Poo.

Frankly bigger news is that the Chinese are forcibly shutting down industry on the mainland because they don't have enough power. This is expected to further push up the price of aluminium (China produces about 20% of the world's supply at the moment) which, on top of an alreay 30 some % rise this year, may render my industry somewhat unviable in any case. You may see the first plastic unitised facades before long, or perhaps this will precipitate a leap forward in construction materials technology and we'll all be living in carbonfibre shells by the end of the decade. Top.

8.20, so I should go get ready for work.

Bomber out

Good luck mate

Dave leaves for Oz tomorrow, his heavy lifter plane is on standby and the local retail association Sydney has been warned of his impending arrival and has stocked up on fags and pies.

Mate, good luck and remember not to let too much blood flow to your head, I hear sleeping under the bar is a good cure for that particular Ozzie complaint. Oh, yes, and watch the whinging, they're a bit sensitive about that.

Dave also told me he is looking for a new laptop, Cnet recommend the following.

Best gaming laptopDell Inspiron XPS Extreme Edition Loaded with the fastest desktop Pentium 4 processors, a big 15.4-inch display, a rich-sounding subwoofer, and a screaming 128MB ATI Mobility Radeon 9700 graphics chip, the Inspiron XPS is built for gamers. Predictably, battery life isn't great, and at 11.5 pounds, it's too heavy to take on the road regularly. But if you're a gamer who's at peace with keeping a laptop on your desk, this is the one to get.

The same article covers the best of everything (from the CNet perspective of stuff available in the states) but "best laptop / PC for downloading prawn" doesn't seem to have made the cut.

Bomber out

The shandy drinker is back in the saddle

Dave's notes regarding Bubble's and my relative drinking prowess notwithstanding (coz he's right) I do recall going home on Friday because that's when Dave left; not the other way round. Any possible contention that he then went out again or was in any significant way less drunk than me, while believable at first glance, don't stand up to close examination.

The Ruth Chris trip on Saturday sounds like I missed out, though. I've still never been there and am consrtantly advised by folks with waistlines I can only aspire to, that they represent the best steaks in town.

Onto important matters, though, and we've got a solution to the HK sevens ticket fiasco. Seems that DP was absolutely correct when he said that members of the HKRFU get guaranteed tickets. 500 HK$ to join and your first year subs (250/ year subsequently) and you will receive an order form for 2 tickets per member sometime in September. The form is here.

Otherwise you could book through an agent, but I expect the premium on the tickets will be higher. Any e\wanting acommodation at Chez Bomble next March. Get yer orders in now.

Bomber out