unseen countdown

Remeber countdown? Random selection of letters and the contestants make words up from them in front of a big clock? Well "random selection" doesn't mean it wouldn't spell something straight off, and this one is a corker. Sweary in an embarrassed BBC sort of way

A twisted tale fro those of you who thought oral sex was safe sex

An Illinois man has won the right to sue his ex-girlfriend for using his sperm to impregnate herself without his permission. Richard Phillips, a family doctor in Chicago, says he never had intercourse with Sharon Irons, also a doctor. They
did, however, have oral sex three times during their brief affair; Irons apparently saved some of Phillips' semen and secretly impregnated herself with it. Phillips broke off the relationship when he discovered Irons had lied to him about being divorced. Two years later, she sued him for child support, and DNA tests showed he is the father. While the Illinois Appellate Court ruled that Phillips can sue for emotional distress, it rejected his claims of fraud and theft, agreeing with Irons' lawyers that "when plaintiff 'delivered' his sperm, it was a gift.... There was no agreement that the original deposit would be returned upon request."

Yeah, it was a gift he thought, as he said "Have THAT" and unloaded...

I should write for Pr0n rags

How would you explain it to the kid?

Bomber out

Afternoon news for you...

The reverend Blair has been at it again, trying to get his Anti-terrorism bill passed

"I reject completely the allegation that this is a fundamental attack on longstanding civil liberties" The use of the word fundamental worries me here. He then goes on to say "...there is no greater civil liberty than to live free from terrorist attack" Which sounds enough like a Bushism to have me rolling my eyes. I'm surprised he doesn't just call it the patriot act and be done with it. Does this mean we get the Wes Middlands Serious Crime Squad back? I do hope so.

On a spacey note, this pic from the boys at the European space agency, who think they have found a frozen ocean on Mars




Looks more like a landing strip than an ocean, but then what do I know?

Then this bunch of twaddle from the Association of British Insurers who say that owning (not just driving) an uninsured vehicle a should become a criminal offence. No shit; who would have thought they'd say something like that? These protectors of the public good state that 30 quid is added to car insurance premiums due to uninsured accidents. Does that mean that, if it's criminalised, the premiums will drop by 30 quid a year...? "er well, mumble mumble, actually, taking into account changes in err, oh; and 9:11, October storms etc, well ... no."

Finally this on Millie and Charlie, which I know Dave and Dunc, as avid royal supporters, will be keen to catch up on;


The wedding is legal, says lord chancellor. Well hurrah! I also heard on Auntie that Millie, although she will be titled "princess consort", which in royal parlance translates into English roughly as "Carlie's tart", will for all legal intents and purposes be Queenie if Big Ears gets the top spot. If he dies on the throne, so to speak, would Millie then become Queen...? This begs the possibility; perhaps the wedding is intentionally illegal to avoid any possibility of her eventual succession to the throne, should she outlive Charles. Another winner from the Defender of the Faith! Not sure of the rules, but I'm sure they involve cousin marriage.

I'm also fairly sure that the queen was asked not to attend rather than her refusing, due to her habit of getting sqiffy and heckling during the service. "Oi, freckle face; he's had your sister, you know" is an enduring favorite of mine from '86 at W. Abbey.

Suggested heckles for Millie and Charlie's big day;

"Till death do us part? Yeah well; worked the first time"
"That's no monstrous carbuncle, that's your wife!"
"This chamber looks like it was made by Indians, are you sure we're in the right place dear?"
"Where d'you get that ring; Asda?"

Bomber out

Brussels International Festival of Fantastic Film! Fucking Brilliant!

6 days of fantasy, SCIFI and Horror flicks including PAUL SCHRADER'S EXORCIST : THE ORIGINAL PREQUEL (not the apparently crap released one)

In fucking March; too fucking early. Fucking Hell



Book your seats for next year!

Bomber out

Wow

Hunter S Thompson shot himself yesterday according to this article in the Denver post which was then picked up by AICN

Bomber out

Mornin' all

Sparky sent me this link to a rather good rearrangement of "Going Underground". Can you spot the lyrical changes; they're subtle (note; slightly sweary and so not safe for some over-sensitive bosses' ears)

In the news today and AFP reports that "40 percent of Japanese university students cannot find Iraq on map " which is a bit rich when I recall a report that 60% of American adults can't find their own state on a map of the US with the names removed. Oh; and "Swedish temptress penguins fail to attract new mates at German zoo" which gave me some really odd images

Finally, I went to post this link I noticed a week ago about AICN thinking Constantine (the new K Reeves flick) is actually quite good (?!) and they've completely revamped their website! Gone the random collection of fonts and sizes (well, mostly) and the crazy autistic layout (although the brown theme is still in evidence) and they've added a search engine! I'll report back when I've dug up some of the better movie reviews on this site of sites. I did notice, though, that they link to a trailer of Dave's favorite ever PKD book; A Scanner Darkly. Due out September. Trailer is as cool as fuck; I was initially put off by the fact that they've done that thing where they made the animated characters look like the actors (only not like that stupid cunting Shark's tale, where Scorcese the puffer fish has really thick eye-brows and will Smith fish has thick lips) but exactly like them. Then I watched the trailer further and I think they've actually filmed the movie then animated over the film, which gives a really "I wonder if that's what an acid trip is like" effect. Brilliant. I only hope that the whole movie is made this way and not just sequences.

We're warming up for a weekend of rugger, culminating in England's last chance to redeem themselves in the Ireland match on Sunday, so fingers crossed.

Bomber out